Page 13 - To Family with Love
P. 13

Kiki, the sparrows, tits and the whole class, for the matter to be set straight once and for all.
My biology professor said that I and my theory were already a hot topic in the teachers’ lounge and that the school psycholo- gist had also shown interest in me. She then went on to tell a far- fetched story, the one you’ve all heard in your schools, in which my Kiki takes no part at all, and where the key role is played by a certain Darwin – to add salt to injury, the story doesn’t even make it possible to tell which bird genus the guy belongs to.
I kindly thanked her, completely dissatisfied with the an- swer and even more with the fact that she interrupted me. It was absolutely clear that anyone who wanted to write shouldn’t go to school, so I mostly continued writing at home, in order to final- ly finish the story of how and why I remained an only child in peace. Here I will list only the reasons I know you will remem- ber, not ramble on as they do at school. The first reason was that my folks no longer wanted children, not even their own, because they were pretty and unnecessarily surprised by me; the second reason was that pets were leaving us in short order, either by choice or by chance, all for the purpose of training and showing me how sad, difficult and horrible it is to live alone.
Supposedly I, too, have almost suffered the same fate as the pets, all of which happened when I was about halfway to four (4:2=2; see, I never miss an opportunity to practice some math), but I have no knowledge or written information about it, because it was an age darker than the Middle Ages, and because I was liv- ing in total ignorance at that time. I was apparently still shitting and pissing all over the apartment without any order or warning when my folks decided to give me to someone somewhere in the country, so I would be in good hands, but they changed their

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