Page 30 - To Family with Love
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that was especially true in my class whenever I would open my mouth to respond to something. If you’re already a stutterer, it would be quite nice to be blind, too, so you wouldn’t see every- one laughing at you.
They crack up the most when a stutterer is telling a joke about stuttering, so I also often had to tell one, and it was so bit- terly and closely connected to my personal war.
− M m m ay I I I be ex ex cused!, and then Dino from the second rows would ask:
− And what for, sonny?
− I I nn nnne nneeed to g g go t t t to the t t t...
− You need to go to the toilet?
− Th th th thaa nnn kss thanks, n n n n ow ow oow now I
d d d on onn onn don’t ne nee need to g g go an an any mo mo moore, I’m d d d d on on one done.
Then, the whole class would burst into laughter, because the joke was hilarious, and I would shit my pants every so often anyway. It didn’t matter that there was actually a war going on and the situation wasn’t funny at all. After that mockery, I would always run to my hideout to see my stray pals and sing Hrvatine to them until my tears stopped flowing.
I will no longer be writing in the language of the stutterers, because that would prolong our book indefinitely, and as you already know, when I write, I do not stutter.
So, I would often find myself in the hideout, and I was still looking for those friends in high places with the aim of closing the schools during the war, but my absences and efforts were getting noticed, and whenever someone would notice something about me, that would immediately be brough to my ma’s atten- tion: her son gallivants all day long, he hasn’t been to school in two days, and so on. Since my mom had no idea about that and didn’t really know how to respond, we went to the doctor’s once again. The doctor told my mother that she was worrying for no

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